Morning Rush Hour

This morning I awoke to sweat trickling down my scalp and an oppressive heat encompassing my body. Holy Hell I Was Hot! I kicked my covers off and noticed that it was very quiet in my room. For those of you that know me this is not just an anomaly but an unprecedented event. I do not sleep anywhere without a fan or some sort of white noise going. I can’t sleep without it. I glanced over at the alarm clock and saw nothing. The power was out! For all I knew it could have been 2am or 9am; I was praying for 2am even though that would have meant I had only been asleep about 2 hours. Yes, yes, yes, the Sandman is eluding me again, even with Ambien. So I lay in bed and tried to go back to sleep but this is where the fan/white noise comes into play; sleep just wasn’t going to happen. This went on for about an hour and TA-DA the lights came back on! To my delight it was just after 6 and I was not late for work. Granted, this was not the best start to my day but at least I wasn’t late.

So I am on my way into work, stopped at a traffic (not a stop*) light in front of the Target shopping center, when I notice one of the light poles swaying in the wind. Three things to keep in mind here; 1 – only one light pole was swaying, 2 – its 7:10 in the morning so the parking lot in front of Baby-R-Us is empty and 3- there is no wind.

So my cat-like reflexes kicked in and my sharp eyes start scanning the parking lot to find out what is going on. By the by, it wasn’t so much my cat-like reflex as my cat-like curiosity. To my astonishment and sick sense of humor, I see a cobalt blue truck in front of the light pole. Now this truck had an extra tire not only on the cabs roof but also on the hood. It was also loaded down with a variety and plethora of pipes, plumbing equipment and trash. The front end was also freshly crumpled. Did I put on my blinker so I could get into the turning lane and go see if anyone needed helped? I did not; mainly because I don’t use my turn signals but also because I couldn’t stop laughing. Some idiot had crashed into a poor defenseless light pole in the middle of an empty parking lot. What joy! We are talking possible Darwin Award winner. My day was looking better.


*Parental Unit #1 is always getting on to me because I call it a stop light and not a traffic light. Her reasoning is that you don’t just stop at the light, but use it to gauge the flow of traffic. Whatever

Side note: The guy was fine. He got out of his truck and started picking up pieces of his front fender.